Venting...?

After today, I really realized, how the majority of my friends are now just my acquaintances. Like honestly, at first I thought it was because I'm always doing my own thing and they're always partying that's why we all don't hangout. But really, even when they're not partying or I'm not busy they still don't even put effort to hangout with me. I used to hate how they assume I'm always with my boyfriend and they never took time to find out whether I am really hanging out with him or not. At times I'm at home doing nothing at all and wanting to hangout with them because I DO MISS THEM. I'm the one who IMS them, who ask what are they doing. But when it all comes down to it, they're the ones who don't try to meet me halfway. It's all words that they miss me and everything, I actually started to feel like a bad friend when I don't hangout with them. Yes I did isolate myself, from partying and doing the bad stuff; not from my friendships with them though. Now I know I should stop caring because like everyone says, it's not "my scene" anyway. I don't party, I don't roll, I don't get high, doesn't mean I'm a lot better than them. I mean, at this age, I don't want to go down that road where I know my life doesn't need to be at that level. I'm glad I don't ever have to go through that phase to find happiness, I am happy. I'm more than just content, I'm grateful for those who have decided to walk out of my life and not be there for me, because if it wasn't for them, I wouldn't have realized how great my friends who still make effort to hangout, catch up, talk to me, take the initiative to be a friend to me are. I know it's because we all changed, I did, for the better. I'm sorry I wouldn't allow myself to stoop to that level to be in that crowd to able to hangout with you guys but I'm done trying to be the bigger person who always feel bad. Surprisingly I am not bitter or sad about this, I'm happy for you guys that you found stuff to occupy your life with.

Live for those nights where your friends turn into family. I'm thankful for those who stuck around and really be there for me<3>On a more irritating note, my phone won't let me go on Xanga, I can't even sign into my own username. Stupid "content descretion advise" it's just Xanga, and neither will it let me sign on MySpace. By the way, this is another reason why I started using BlogSpot because I couldn't sign on my Xanga to blog :( I think the T-Mobile guy is messing around with my internet and won't let me go on a lot of websites because Kim's phone isn't like that. Booo, I guess I can't shop on my phone anymore, or until awhile. Also, I need to reformat my computer because it's super slow and I hate using the laptop. I am getting sleepy. I will stop now because this blog is just getting unnecessarily longer.

Peaceassssy. This blog was pretty much me spilling out my concerns and bothers.