The idea of love,

There was a time in my life where all I wanted was to love and be love. But, all that has changed. I don't feel the need to obtain a lover at all times. Maybe later, but not right now. I'm currently going with the flow, of course. Needless to say, I realized the person I need to love the most is myself. Sometimes I forget to love me for me and who I am. I try not to shift anything in my life too much to the point that I forget who I am. As of lately, I'm back to figuring out my wants and needs.

The thought of marriage has been popping up a lot. And I'm not a pessimistic person or anything, I can assure you, but I don't believe in marriage. I know it's possible, I know there are amazing relationships and marriages that lasts, but it's not for me. The idea of falling in love, settling down, being with someone for the rest of your life, then having kids sound extremely ideal and nice, but, that's not what I want. For the most part, it's because I'm still young, my mentality as of right now is to just worry about the present and the future will come. So maybe that's why I don't think too much about marriage because I often don't think too far down into the future.

I love love and the idea of love, but sometimes, that's all it really is; an idea. You build it up in your head, and sometimes it lives up to be exactly what you thought it would be, or it's the total opposite. I've been a lone wolf lately. My heart and my head has been aligning together. Neither of them want me to fall in love, and that's fine with me. If I fall in love with someone, I will. When you love someone, you'll know, it's not a maybe thing. It's not something you can control either so I'm just going to let time take its course. Like I've always said, what's meant to be will be.