love is just love.

You had me feeling like I was the luckiest person in the world, but because you had that power, you knew how to break me down as well. You build me up, with your words, with your affection. But in the end, the outcome of it all turned out worse than I thought. I would've never imagined myself so disappointed and angry at you. I can't even explain in words because when I tell you it goes in one ear and comes out the other. You make no effort at all, you wait until we're not together to try and prove to me we should be together. Why do I even bother? Why is it always me. I guess because I'm not heart-strong and I want to be with you too but when you've been hurting for so long in a relationship; you find it's not worth it. How long do you want me to hold on for until you completely stop caring about me? You're on a verge of doing so already, all you care about is your friends and I don't mind that, they're my friends too. But when it comes down to me, you have no concern whatsoever. I expected more from you, but to you, I was expecting too much. I guess I asked for too much when I ask for you to love me, to treat me like I'm your girlfriend, to be the person whom I fell in love with. But who are you now? I don't even know. Honestly I don't. I see you and I feel like I see a stranger, your intentions, your motives, who the hell are you and what have you done to your old self? If you ask me, I hate who you've become. At least who you have become towards me. I've been fine without you, I realize how much I don't need to depend on you. You're not there for me anyway. Ever. I need something and you put me off to do something else. Regardless whatever it was, I always try to be there for you. You've pushed me away to a limit where I don't want to go back. All I can do is move forward because you don't care about this relationship. If you did you would've done something to kept it, but you let it slip right through your fingers. Maybe you haven't realized that this time, you could lose me. For good. And honestly, I don't care about you anymore. At least I don't want to. You care so much for someone who doesn't appreciate you for the things you've done and is still doing, it only wastes your time and effort. Damn, sometimes I wish you were a girl so you can feel how hurt I am. But you're just a boy, you don't understand. And how you treat me on a daily when we were together is how you treat your friends. Actually I take that back, you treat your friends so much better than you will ever treat me in the future. I think you need to learn how to be a boyfriend again before you start going out with someone else or maybe you can get with someone easy. Who knows, I don't feel anything about love at this point and time. I feel no vulnerability, sadness, aggravation. Love is just love.